communication

The 6 Family Roles In Addiction

When addiction happens, it happens to the whole family, and addiction comes in so so so many forms.  Whether the addiction is to food, alcohol, heroine, marijuana, chaos (etc.), whether the addiction is loud or quiet, whether the addiction is ...

HOTLINE BLING

I know what you're thinking, and the answer is no.  But I'll get to that in a second, first I want to tell you a little story.Once upon a time in a far away land called the early 90's, there was no internet and no Netflix, and when people felt ...

5 Signs of a Bad Listener

There are so many incredibly simple things in life that we unnecessarily complicate; listening is one of them. More specifically, there are 5 ways that listeners unintentionally taint conversations that have the potential to be so connective. If ...

Switch These 2 Words During Your Next Tough Conversation

As Donn King says, people are not logical, they're psycho-logical.  When it comes to effectively communicating, there's a certain three letter word that causes a whole lot of trouble.  This word, especially when used during an argument or ...

9 Lessons On Connection I've Learned from Being a Therapist

In no particular order, these 9 lessons continue to pop up in my work as a therapist.  No matter who the person is, no matter what the situation is, there are some things that remain true no matter what:1.  People will rarely tell others ...

Pretty Much the Number One Communication Tool of All Time

I wish he would just bring me flowers once in a while. --Does he know how much you would like that, or what your favorite kind of flowers are? No, but it should be obvious--who doesn't want flowers?  And anyway, I don't want to tell him to do it, ...

6 Steps to An Effective Apology - Part 4

Well, this is taking longer than you thought it would.  What happened to a heartfelt, "I'm sorry." (?) Small offenses are salved by a heartfelt I'm sorry, and since I'm guessing you tried that and it didn't work, this might be a bigger offense than ...

6 Steps to An Effective Apology - Part 3

So, you've taken care of the first step of apologizing and you definitely have a handle on the second.  Without further adieu, here 's step 3 (which might just be the most important step): 3.  Identify the main hurt in the other person. Being "hurt" ...

6 Steps to an Effective Apology - Part 1

“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry for them to believe me?!”  I hear that phrase a lot in my practice, and I know it’s a frustrating place to be.  You did something hurtful, you’re truly sorry, you said you were sorry and you wholeheartedly ...

6 Steps to an Effective Apology / Part 2

If you've figured out what you're actually sorry for, you're ready for step two of a meaningful apology: 2. Explain your state of mind. An apology is as much an explanation as it is an expression of regret.  If you're sorry for your behavior and the ...